QUICK QUESTION FOR RICK SANTORUM

…the Bleacherman has entered the stadium…his hand is raised…he wants to ask several questions to Rick Santorum…

Oh Rick, recently you were asked by reporters to clarify your statement about President Obama’s faith or as you put it, his false theology.  You said, in very certain terms, that he is wrong for imposing his secular values on the Church.

Okay, then if I may ask, using the same logic, isn’t the Church wrong for imposing its religious values on the secular?  Do I not have the right not to believe in God?  Do I have the right to believe that my Creator was a large implosion of matter?

And while I’m asking questions here, how can you stand before a crowd and condemn government spending when, during your tenure in Congress, you sponsored millions of dollars in specific earmarks for Pennsylvania companies.  Isn’t that like toying with Socialism?  You made sure an aircraft company received millions of dollars in grants and in return, they donated thousands of dollars to your campaign.  Isn’t that like corruption?  And of course you voted to give hundreds of thousands of dollars to Sarah Palin’s ‘Bridge to Nowhere in Particular.’  Isn’t that like being a hypocrite or something?

I mean how can a God fearing man like you be a corrupt Socialist hypocrite?  Your God would surely not approve.  Even my God doesn’t approve.

So Rick, we have a problem.  We really have a problem.  As our Native Americans would say; you speak with forked tongue.

One further question if I may, Rick…how does your God intend to keep gas prices lower.  Last time I looked, oil produced here in America (or in Canada) is selling for the same price as foreign produced oil.  So if your God wants us to exploits his earth, okay, that is his right but how does that translate to lower gas prices?  If everyone will charge the same price for their oil how does domestically produced oil lower the prices of gas?  Profit is profit and God help you if you try to keep the rich from getting richer.  I mean (all stand) Praise God and those Oil Speculators.  Amen. (Be seated)

I’m waiting for your answers Rick…today is Sunday so you’re off the hook for an immediate response.  Go pray to your God.  And while you’re there; ask your God to stay the hell out of my house.

…the Bleacherman has left the stadium waiting for answers to his questions…